www.montereycountynow.com december 26, 2024-january 1, 2025 MONTEREY COUNTY WEEKLY 21 Welcome No More By Roy Verley The maintenance worker stared solemnly at the historic plaque he’d been ordered to remove. He’d cleaned and polished it countless times through years of “working the statue” and, as an immigrant, had always felt reassured by its welcoming message. Until now. “Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning to breathe free...I lift my lamp beside the golden door!” Puzzled, he rang his supervisor. “You sure this plaque comes down? Feels like something’s dyin’ here.” “Yes,” she said. “Orders from the top.” “And then?” “Hide it. Cherish it. And pray one day we get to put it back.” Train Trip By Nicki Ehrlich The train lay still on the tracks. I hadn’t seen it arrive. New to this mode of travel, I focused on the opening doors, followed others more experienced. A planned adventure, I wanted a good seat where I could take in the approaching scenery. I trudged up the stairs with my baggage, delighted there were so few of us. I didn’t like crowds. The seats faced both ways, but most faced west, surely the way forward. I sat. Arranged my belongings. Smiled. The train moved. I found myself facing backward with the freedom only to watch what I left behind. The Italian Game By Tara Mann Grandpa’s old chessboard sits on a box in the attic. On a whim, you move the white king’s pawn forward. The next day, black king’s pawn has responded. An eerie voice whispers as you move your kingside knight to free your pawn. The next day, black’s knight has responded. Your bishop attacks. The chilly air fogs your breath, the house creaking around you. You find your sister in the kitchen. “You know Grandpa’s chessboard—” “In the attic? I have to tell you something crazy.” “Me, too.” You share a glance, and then together—“I think I’m playing chess with Grandpa’s ghost.” Juneteenth By Bruce Merchant He was a babe in arms when they came with what they called The Declaration, which said, “All men are created equal.” His father cried, “We are all going to be free!” He grabbed his baby boy and danced around and said, “My baby boy is going to be free!” He was on his deathbed when they came around again. He had worked from the time he was 5. He had sired 17 children, sold to other plantations. When they said, “There is a Proclamation that slavery is ended,” he shook his head and said, “All my life. All my life.” Cream Hustler By Mike Haugh I probably shouldn’t call my cat, Spotty, a “cream hustler,” but if the name fits…I mean, what should I call her when every time I go to make myself a cup of coffee, she freely appears on the counter meowing and rubbing herself about me until I surrender to her feline charm and pour her a smattering of cream. Now, it’s whenever I open the fridge, I find her circling my feet like I’m a wagon train under attack, until I appease her creamy addiction. Spotty is the Oliver Twist of cats: “Please, sir, I want some more.” French Fries By Clare Mounteer Monsieur Feury surveyed the bored looking faces before him and thought longingly of the twinkling lights of Paris which would soon transform the city’s landscape. Soon he would return and put this teaching assignment behind him. He sighed and began the lesson. “Mes amis, we are ’ere to pronounce French correctly—parler correctement le français.” He paused. “Michael, read the sentence on the board, s’il vous plaît. It means ‘would you like fries with that?’” Michael read the sentence. “Mais non, mon ami, the ‘t’ is not silent in the word ’frites,’ it should not be pronounced ‘free,’ but, ‘freet.’” This Thanksgiving Guest Made a Big Hit By Scotty Cornfield Bobby “Four-Banger” was the family’s freelance hit man, but with his notorious temper and his kills “just Going Downhill By Shawn Boyle Jasper shockingly eyeballed the “Free Piano” sign as he slammed on the brakes. He hopped out and quickly hightailed to the piano on the corner. It was surprisingly in good condition. The wheels were perfectly functioning, almost like roller skates. He played the main chord of Sheila E. “The Glamorous Life” in tune on the keys. He thought this was too good to be true. He got on one end and gave it a huge heave toward his truck. Only he was not aiming for his truck. Jasper delightfully yelled, “You’re free,” and down the hill the piano became truly free. First Place The Headstone By Laurie Bauer “Why on earth would you do that?” asked Margaret, when her husband Frank described his purchase. “I got a great deal from the stone carver if I bought a double headstone. I’ll just have to add your death date.” Margaret’s face reddened with rage. “I’ve spent 25 years with this guy,” she thought, “and I’ll be damned if I’m going to spend eternity with him.” Luckily for Margaret, Frank died shortly thereafter, and she had many happy years of freedom. She now lies in eternal rest under a shady pine tree, far from Frank, with her very own headstone. The Decoder By David Blackburn Waiting for my wife at the hotel, I sat in a chair within shouting distance of the men’s room. Guys would try the doorknob, notice the keypad below it, and groan, snort, or cuss. I began whisper-yelling “7649!” A sigh of relief or thumbs up would soon follow. Amused, I spotted an old geezer approach and attempted a little bathroom humor. “A penny for your thoughts,” I said. “What?” the old man replied. “A nickel for the code!” I hollered. Grumbling, he headed for a large plant. “I remember pay toilets. I pee freely.” I went to look for my wife. Second Place Third Place Honorable Mentions
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