www.montereycountyweekly.com july 27-august 2, 2023 MONTEREY COUNTY WEEKLY 25 forced to choose between their health care or their happiness. That type of marriage penalty is antiquated.” Meanwhile, Long tried another approach. In November 2022, represented by the Disability Rights Education & Defense Fund (DREDF), she filed an administrative complaint with the Social Security Administration calling upon them to strike the provision. “We are asking for freedom to marry,” says Ayesha Elaine Lewis, staff attorney for DREDF. “This is an issue that has been important to the disability community for a long time. People feel really strongly about the freedom to marry and have relationships with the people that they choose…In the not-so-distant past, a lot of people with disabilities lived in institutions, where they didn’t have that much autonomy over their lives. “We all deserve to feel like we can be part of our communities. There’s this idea [about people with disabilities] that you need to be taken care of, that you’re not an adult fully—that’s not true, and it’s hurtful.” The complaint is still pending, with no response. Meanwhile, Long and Contreras are still engaged but not married. They continue to work as activists both for themselves, and on behalf of others, to change an antiquated marriage law. They missed the opportunity to have Long’s mom at their wedding; she died in 2018. “It was her dying wish to see Mark and me married. But at least she got to know him and love him as well,” Long says. Long’s health and pain is a continuous challenge. She was born with a rare autoimmune disease, ankylosing spondylitis, which causes fractures in her spine, leading to spinal deformity and pain, and many surgeries—including about three months into their relationship. “At 2 in the morning, we were driving to the hospital,” Long recalls. “I should’ve been thinking, ‘please don’t let me die today.’ Instead I was thinking, ‘please don’t let me throw up in his truck.’” (She received emergency surgery for an obstruction, an issue related to the shape of her spine.) Still, the couple travels, goes out with friends, and attends church every Sunday at Madonna del Sasso in Salinas. Long keeps joking about all of it, and Contreras responds easily with laughter. Even through years of hardship, she embraces light banter. “I’ll say, I drove him to drink and to church. He didn’t drink much and he didn’t go to church much…” “It really helped,” Contreras chimes in. “Drinking or church?” Long asks with a half-smile. Contreras answers seriously. “Church. It helped me reset.” Driven by a combination of love, faith—according to their Christian beliefs, they should only live together after marriage, something that makes them uncomfortable—and a sense of justice, they continue fighting for marriage equality. “Love is at the forefront—this is a really beautiful love story between two people. There’s no way in hell I am going to let this policy be the last chapter of this love story,” Long says. “I hope we can be a face and voice for positive change.” The photographs in these pages document that story, including beyond the roles they have come to occupy as activists—just as two people, living their lives, and hoping they can fulfill a dream. These photographs are exhibited in The Press Club, 1123 Fremont Blvd., Seaside. For details about an opening reception, view p. 29. Long spends her mornings doing physical therapy exercises and getting ready for work at Home Goods. At Cali Roots, Long is especially excited to see Kolohe Kai. During a show by Dispatch (pictured), she and Contreras get up to dance. “There is a lot to be bitter about, but I want to be as positive as possible,” Long says. “The cards I was dealt…it’s not fruitful. I don’t want to live unhappy.” Contreras and Long attend church most Sundays, seen here in the mission in San Juan Bautista. Primarily they go to Madonna del Sasso in Salinas. Their pastor, Father Greg Sandman, wrote a letter in support of Lori’s Law to Congressman Panetta.
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